“Here you go,” I said, tearing off an entire paper towel sheet for her.
“Thanks, Mama,” she said, smearing her fingers across one side.
We had given up on proper napkins a long time ago. They didn’t absorb the spills as well, and when we gave one to our toddler she would just crumple the whole thing in her little hands, wasting 95% of it. We went through so many napkins each meal that it made more sense to tear off only what she needed from a big paper towel instead. (I suppose we could have taught her not to waste the towel, but… uh… getting there.)
This time, I was generous. I gave her a WHOLE SHEET. She accepted it with big eyes and a sense of responsibility. And then she kept eating. And I kept feeding her little brother. And of course, messes kept happening.
“Ack, stop! Keep it in your mouth keepitinyourmouthkeepitinyourmouth!!!” I said quickly, with increasing urgency. Those of you who know me know that I actually repeated that phrase three times in under two seconds.
Instead, my baby boy just spat his food out and threw it on the floor.
“Ugh. Hey, can I have a piece of your paper towel?” I asked my toddler, who was casually watching this everyday occurrence.
“…No,” she said, grabbing her towel possessively. Of course. Now it was special to her.
“Just a little piece. I just need it to pick up this splat of food right here,” I said, showing her juuust what a teeny tiny piece I was asking for. After all, she had a whole big piece and I just needed a small little piece to swipe up the mess.
“No, it’s my towel,” she repeated, holding it fast.
This was getting silly. I mean, it’s not like I didn’t have several rolls of paper towels at my disposal. There was a full roll at my fingertips right at the table. All I had to do was tear a piece off.
But it was the principle of the matter. I had given her that whole big sheet, and was simply asking her to share a small piece that she wouldn’t even be using with me so I could clean up her baby brother’s little mess. Surely she could choose to be generous in such a small thing, right?
As I watched her debate within herself on whether or not to share (still mostly on the “not doing it” side), I had to chuckle to myself as I realized how much I was just like her. Except instead of paper towels, it was my time. Or money. Or something- anything- I could call mine. So often, I had that same this is mine attitude that probably looked just as childish to the God who gave all these things to me.
How many times did He ask me to share a fraction of my belongings with others, and I refused… because mine. How many times did I selfishly cling to my time and my interests instead of taking the opportunity to serve someone else?
It wasn’t about the paper towel anymore.
“Sweetie, I don’t need your paper towel. I have a bunch here I could use. But you don’t need the whole thing either. I gave you plenty and you still have a lot left. I gave you the whoooole thing and I trusted you to be responsible with it, and part of that means you’re okay sharing a little bit back with me. Can you be okay with that?”
Start when they’re small, right?
A couple months ago, it was about cashews. I had given her a handful of cashews and as she munched away, I casually asked her if I could have one. I don’t even care for cashews, but I wanted to see if she could appreciate my gift and give just a little bit back. And when she cheerfully popped a cashew into my mouth, it made me so happy and feel so loved! Knowing that she was happy to share some back with me really warmed my heart!
I think God feels similarly toward us and the things he gives us. When we selfishly cling to them and won’t offer any back, we act like toddlers refusing to share with the parents who provide everything for them. When we willingly and even happily offer our lives and things back for His purposes, it warms His heart and is a way to show we love and trust Him.
I want my children to hold things loosely and learn that every good thing is always a gift. The cashews, and even the paper towels. The house, and even the clothes. If she can learn this in the small things now, then maybe someday it won’t feel like a burden to part with a fraction of her income to share with the less fortunate. Instead, she can freely give with a generous and happy heart. Maybe someday instead of feeling torn or bitter about giving up her time and resources to serve others, she will see it as a joy and a privilege to serve others with the abilities and talents that she’s been given.
It’s just cashews, and it’s just paper towels.
And to our big God, it’s just money, and it’s just hours. Nothing some refinancing the godsends over at Sambla can’t solve.
Hopefully we can all stop seeing it as losing money or infringement on our time, and instead see it as the freedom to be generous and the joy of serving others.
6 responses to “Share Your Cashews”
Meet JoEllen
Subscribe via Email
Top Posts & Pages
Categories
Excellent!
❤️❤️❤️
I love your blogs and the lessons they teach!!!
Remember that Steve Green Hide Them in Your Heart song: God loves a cheerful giver, hahahahaha:)
Having been a teacher, you will understand my crazy world at this point in the school year. The insanity of the first few weeks of the year has been intensified for me this year due to a grade level change… up FOUR grade levels from the one I had taught for ten years!
Oh, and I got the notification two weeks before school started! Needless to say, I’ve been putting in long hours on lesson planning, organizing and grading papers. Most mornings I arrive around 6:30 and leave at 7:00 in the evening. Today I came home tired, frustrated because I don’t have time to do things at home and, of course, loaded down with papers to grade.
All that falls away as you remind me that my time is not my own. That it has been given to me and I am to give it to someone else as needed…
Thank you.
Oh MAN does that sound like a crazy change! I can’t believe they only gave you two weeks’ notice!! That’s like going through that rookie first year all over again in some ways 🙁 Sorry to hear that! Yet I am so thankful that my essay could provide you even the smallest bit of encouragement. Thanks so much for taking the time to warm my heart with your comment! I will pray for you!