When she was just a baby, this was a colorful caterpillar toy that she batted at and pushed around. I rattled it for her, spun the spinny thing around, and made funny faces with it by my face.
For the most part, the toy sat in the basket, something that she rarely reached for.
A few months later, she rediscovered this colorful little guy and to her delight, it rattled and shook and spun! I couldn’t wait for her to discover the fun of pulling it apart and putting it back together in whatever configuration she pleased. Unfortunately, her little hands were not yet strong enough to pull the pieces apart. So, in an effort to show her one way to play with it, I tried setting it up to make it easy for her to pull apart. Sometimes this worked, and she experienced the joy of taking the bug apart… but unless I was right there with her playing with it, her interaction with it was still limited to spinning a bit and rattling a bit. This only kept her interest for so long, but it was a step forward!
Again, the toy found its way to the bottom of the toy bin, smiling but unloved.
One day, as I was rotating toys out, I left it on the floor. When I came back to it, the head was gone.
Wait, the head was gone.
HOORAY! THE HEAD WAS GONE!
I turned and found my daughter, who was turning a yellow and green smiling head about in her hands, “You did it! You took apart the caterpillar!” She smiled and then proceeded to dismantle the whole thing, one segment at a time.
It’s the little things, guys.
As I’ve observed her growing ability to interact with this toy, I couldn’t help but reflect on how
babies : caterpillar toys :: I : Bible
For you younguns, that’s old school SAT speak for babies interact with caterpillar toys like how I interact with the Bible.
At one point, the Bible was this monstrously huge book that I hardly knew what to do with. I mean, I couldn’t even read the first time I encountered one. (It probably didn’t help that the Bible on my mother’s nightstand was in Chinese, which I still can hardly read). I imagine I poked at it, opened it up for a look-see, and probably moved her red ribbon bookmark to the wrong place before folding some of the thin pages upon themselves as I shut the heavy tome. Oops.
Bat bat, observe.
Years passed, and I had my own children’s Bible that sat on the shelf and thought about maybe never. Although I heard stories from the Bible week after week at church, I don’t think I ever really tried interacting with it myself until I was in fourth grade. I still remember the day my new Sunday School teacher, Hugo, walked into The White House. That’s what we called the decrepit shack that I spent so many of my childhood Sunday mornings in. He walked in, thumped his heavy Bible onto the table and then asked us which book of the Bible we wanted to read.
He asked us.
Like we were interested in the book.
Like it was ours to care about. Like it was something we’d choose to interact with.
And we did.
I think we all sat up a little straighter, felt a little more grown up, and decided that this God stuff was a little more our thing than just our parents’ thing that day.
And that’s how this Chinese guy who was on the Cal football team and who taught fourth grade Sunday School touched my life. The Bible now belonged to me.
Rattle rattle, spin spin.
So when my mom bought me my very own NIV Student Bible
I probably quit somewhere in Leviticus. I feel like I always kind of quit somewhere in Leviticus. If not Leviticus, then definitely by the time I hit Numbers. Even though I didn’t finish reading it by the end of middle school, this was me “pulling off the head” and really getting into the nitty gritty of it. I don’t think it was until high school that I finally pushed myself and went through the whole thing from Genesis to Revelation. After that, I thought I was done. I did it! I read it! High five! All done, right?
No. Because, like my “infant” who grew into a “baby” that became a “cruiser” and is now a “toddler,” I am always changing. My life situation, experiences, maturity, and outlook are always developing. The JoEllen who read through the Bible in high school
Not so. Not only do I realize that I am not nearly as well-versed (har har pun intended!) in it as I want to be, but I realize I need to be reading the Bible continually to help me keep my life focused on what matters. (BTW I love how Francis Chan frames it here. The 3 minute clip is totally worth watching). If I’m going to be existing forever, I definitely want to spend my short time here on earth doing things that have eternal significance, rather than getting caught up in what clothes I’m wearing or what food I’m eating… two things I spent way too much time thinking about this month.
Thankfully, I can also add Bible reading to things I put my mind to this month. As of yesterday. Because that’s when I started doing it again. I finally got to test out the iOS version of the Bible reading app that Ben’s been working on, and it is fantastic. I promise you I’m not just trying to sell his app (which is free), but I am simply sharing a resource that I love and find useful.
Although there’s a lot to be said for reading through and flipping through an actual physical Bible, I also have to be realistic about my current stage of life and my personal habits. This means that before I go to bed at night, it is really unlikely that I am going to prop up my pillows, turn on the lights, and set a Bible on my lap to read for ten minutes. It’s also extremely unlikely that you’ll find me up and ready at the crack of dawn, before the kids are awake, sitting at the table with hot tea, journal and Bible, doing my quiet times with the Lord. I mean, I’ve always envisioned myself doing that, but it has happened exactly zero times since my daughter was born, so… yeah. (Maybe zero times ever…?)
No, a more realistic picture is me groggily waking up to my alarm, lying in bed, trying to get my brain going as I skim through email on my phone in the morning. Or me, lying in bed before going to sleep at night, staring at my phone and checking out all the fun everyone is having on social media before getting some shuteye. But this app has made a 1-year reading plan feel really doable again… especially because I can do it while nursing or lying in bed or while waiting in line. So I have committed to reading the Bible again, from Genesis to Revelation, by December 31, 2016. Join me! If you start today, it’s only about 11 minutes of reading each day.
Back to Caterpillars…
I’m pretty sure that if I dug out that caterpillar toy for my daughter to play with today, she’d be able to pull it apart and put it all back together. She’s constantly growing and learning and changing, and even though that caterpillar is the same toy it has always been, her ability to grapple with and understand and appreciate it has changed over time. She has developed new abilities, life experience, and fine motor skills that allow her to interact with the toy in ways she couldn’t before. In a way, it feels familiar to her, yet it is a fresh and new experience whenever I bring it out again for her to play with.
Someday, she really will outgrow that thing. There will be no more leveling up. I’m pretty sure that pulling apart and putting back together is about as complex as the thing gets. Thankfully, the Word of God has no such limitations. As we continue to grow and mature as Christians, we will keep coming back to this familiar book only to find fresh encounters and new experiences. We will grapple with it in new ways, flex different muscles in our hearts, souls, and minds as we work through it again and again, bringing and adding more layers of understanding each time. The Word of God is living and active, and my prayer is that you and I will keep coming back to it, finding new ways to let it touch our hearts, minds, and souls.
11 responses to “Lessons from a Decapitated Caterpillar”
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Thanks much for your blog. I enjoy it. What is the name of the Bible app you mentioned?
Thanks!
Bev
Thanks, Beverly! The Bible app is called “A Lamp Unto.” It’s available for Android already (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ben61a.alampunto&hl=en), and is in testing mode for iOS/iPhones. It’s continued to be great, and I hope you love it as much as I do!
Thank you, thank you, and PTL?
Love this post! Reminds me of what Eugene Peterson wrote/said: “It’s so key to remember that following Jesus is a lifestyle ‘on the move’. We don’t stop to admire what we’ve accomplished.”
Thanks! His love for the Word and encouraging others to be in it is part of your legacy :).
Is the bible reading app available for Android too please? What is the precise name please? Enjoyed today’s post. Thank you.
Hi Becky! Yes, actually right now it’s ONLY publicly available on Android! Android WINS! 🙂 Here’s a link to it: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ben61a.alampunto&hl=en
Thanks for the encouragement :).
“But this app has made a 1-year reading plan feel really doable again… especially because I can do it while nursing or lying in bed or while waiting in line.” I had the exact same thought as I was using the app. How often do we kill time scrolling through social media when we’re waiting around for things. Now we can read the Bible instead and feel like we’re making progress towards our goals.
Riiight? I knew you’d feel me on the being-productive-while-nursing part ;D Haha jk but YES seriously love being able to make positive use out of that time. Also, I’m on a 4-day streak now and totally don’t want to break my streak so that has been an unexpected motivator! BTW Ben said you gave excellent feedback :D. Woohoo thanks!